How much self-control do you have?

            If there is one thing I can say about myself, it’s that I’m loud. Everything about me is loud; not just my voice, but my personality, my opinions, my clothing, everything. Everything I’m thinking comes out of my mouth. If I want something, you will hear about it. If I did something I’m proud or embarrassed of, you will hear about it. If I’m angry or happy, there is absolutely no way in this world or any other that you won’t know within three minutes.

            I distinctly remember subbie year when I heard that One Direction was coming to Illinois, I screamed. Not a “haha cool” scream, it was an “OH MY FREAKING GOODNESS I’M SO EXCITED” scream. Everyone in the school heard it and teased me about it for the rest of that school year. They would laugh and bring up the fact that One Direction were coming/had come, or mimic my scream. It was a fun little joke.

            Last semester in Ms. Majerus’ Nineteenth Century Novel class, we were reading Pride and Prejudice and Persuasion by Jane Austen. I absolutely hated those books. They were hard to read, boring, and there was no real objective in the books. When Ms. Majerus asked how we liked each of the books, I said all of those things, and probably more. The entire class knew for a fact that, if I were given the option, I would toss those books in a vault and no child would ever be forced to read them again. Ms. Majerus thought it was hilarious and very nice because I didn’t lie to get on her good side.

            Both of these stories are example of a very fundamental part of my demeanor. I don’t hold back. I’m blunt and honest twelve times out of ten. Usually people like it because it’s funny and refreshing. In a world of liars and people who skirt around the truth, people think it’s nice to talk to me because I’m the opposite.  At least, most of the time they like it.

            There’s a girl in my math class this year that I don’t particularly like. I think she’s stuck up, rude, and condescending. I don’t like being anywhere near her. I don’t like to actually do math, and she forces everyone at her table to keep up with her. I had to sit at her table for a week in a row, and one day I couldn’t do it anymore. She said “let’s stop complaining and do the work” in her most condescending voice, and I gave up. I gave her a look that could have killed someone and said “oh hell no” then I turned around to another table and refused to talk to her for a week while I continued to look at her as if she were spoiled milk.

            These types of situations are typical of me. I’ll get mad and say or do stupid things and then regret what I said or did within ten minutes. That’s egged on by how stubborn I am. Together they lead to mass of problems including, but not limited to saying stupid things, that I know are stupid, and refusing to apologize for them. I run into a lot of problems because I can’t keep anything to myself and my self-control is lacking on a lot of levels. Most of the time people find it funny, but sometimes it’s just seen as rude.